A foreign body

[Bob Fossil]

I once got hit in the face by one of those footballs you played indoor 5-a-side with. You know the felt covered ones that looked like huge tennis balls.
I wasn't expecting it as the game had finished and some prick decided it would be funny to smack this ball into a group of us talking after a game.
I could hardly see as the ball skimmed across my eye and shrugging it off despite the pain, then unable to sleep developing a black eye off to A&E I went.
They managed to peel my eye lids open and some gadget showed that the surface of my eyeball had been damaged and there were thousands of fibres that
needed to be flushed out. 12 months of special eye drops and I was something back to normal.

I had similar playing water polo. Ball skidded off the surface and hit me in the mush at about a trillion miles an hour. Like I had an angry wasp in my eye for about a month and looked like an extra from  28 days later!

[Brentbaggie]

Scratched my eyeball on a hawthorn bush once. I was extremely pissed at the time and didn't really feel it until the next morning. When I really felt it. Went to the eye hospital where they confirmed what I already knew. I shouldn't have fallen face first into a hawthorn bush.

Prior to that, and several years before, a burning cinder from the exhaust pipe of an armoured personnel carrier flew into the same eye. To the surprise of no one it fucking hurt. A lot. Had to walk around with an eye patch for about a week and kept bumping into things. Depending on what it was I happened to catch my shoulder on that hurt too.

Couple of months back I was walking along a footpath beside a busy main road when something flew into my other eye. It felt like I'd been hit by a dart. Only I've never been hit in the eye with a dart so I have reference point so to speak. I think it may have been a tiny piece of gravel. Any road up it scratched my eyeball and I ended up needing drops for a week.

Fortunately I didn't bump into anything this time, presumably because I wasn't wearing an eye patch. All in all I consider myself extremely fortunate not to have scratched either of my eyeballs for a while. Not even when I saw the fat cunt over the road squeezed into his new Villa top. The fat Villacunt.

You sure he's fat or is it just your eyesight?

[Duffers]

Thought this was going to be about FF's latest conquest.

[baggiebloke]

Today I’ve experienced pain like I’ve never had before. Currently on my honeymoon in the borders, just sitting minding my own business having got ready to go out, and I suddenly felt a sensation of an eyelash irritating my eye, a quick rub, and unlike usual the pain remained. I then tried to wash it out, nothing. The next three hours what followed was my left eye watering like mad, and been driven round small border towns trying to get to an optitions so they could have a look. 

Seriously I’ve never felt pain like it, my eye was streaming and I could barely open it or the good eye and then that started to water as well. Eventually sat in the chair to be told there was something under my eyelid less than a mm that’s now scratched my cornea. 

Been told to expect pain for the next two days but it should ease 

Anyone ever has anything similar, or anyone been anywhere but home when a bit of issue happens ?

This is because you didn't follow the new one in, one out prerogative.

[Tom Joad]

I had a twat in a rock club moan about my nephew's who were moaning, this twat was a public school twat, stood in the middle of the 'dance floor'. I pointed it out to him and he kicked off, I stood and looked at him and said 'go on them', braved for a punch and instead the twat scratched my face and eye. Swelled up like a balloon and thought I was gonna like the sight in it. He didn't quite scratch the cornea, but that fuggin' hurt a lot for several days.

Hope yours clears up soon.

Sounds like you needed FF in your crowd. He'd have sorted out the twat issue, pulled the barmaid and walked home  dropping donations at needy causes along the way.